Its past my bedtime , i just thought id let you guys know how much im enjoying being back at writing. If you guys write too just drop in a comment with a link and ill try and catch up with what you are writing. Do remember im not looking for official sites but rather personal ones , and no pictures of cats dressed up please.
Right so lets just get a piece of how i go about blogging currently. Every morning when i get up i generally think about what im going to write about, actually a mini Aha moment occurs while i experience something or while im thinking about something, but yes a basic tiny two liner is drafted in my head every morning. Now whether i get the time to write this idea down , is another thing. So many thoughts have risen and died within a span of a day. At times when i do sit down to write it just doesn't work, i mean either the ideas weak , or boring or just to random for completion ,and then it stays as a draft very rarely completed. And those might be the days that die without a word out.
So what was bothering me this morning you might ask, and i shall lay the thought before you for for consumption. I woke up and all i could think about was negativity. Have you ever come across people, who just are unpleasant , you meet them once and thats just about it , you feel depressed and angry, and then you meet them again and you are certain its not worth another meeting.
I have very recently come across one such man ,and sadly enough its a flatmate. The nature of the man is such that if you were to give him food even though hed been hungry for decade, im certain he would find a way to criticise your cooking, either the salt would be too much for his palate, or he'd complain that the food wasn't hot enough. But thats just not it if it was just a an overcritical man it would be fine, but whats really loathsome is that such a man hides it all behind a highly inflated sense of morality and ooh the manipulation. I think that's getting a bit too personal now. But somehow even the notion of such a man just brings about the worst in me forget about the actual being. Everything is not good enough, if you suggest a restaurant, and the service is slow he would blame you for it not directly but He'd comment in such ways and associate the restaurant with you that you feel responsible for his misadventure.
But that's not it either everything seems so vile for example this daily conversation that we have which I think is basically a gumption trap set for me every morning. The conversation flows like this and this usually happens as im dressing up, or having breakfast before leaving for office
Me: Hello Good Morning (im a good morning person strange enough)
He: hi so are you going to office today
Me: (no im getting dressed for your dads wedding) Haan saab(sir) I have office today
He: saab(sir) aaj holiday nahin hai
Me: nahin saab are you off
He: No but app chutti lele (take a leave today) how much you will work ,every day, they make you work so hard. (delivered in a sarcastic tone)
I personally felt that this morning ritual is specifically put in place to just get me started on the wrong foot. I mean imagine a day you are not really in the mood for work, you know you have an hours commute ahead of you and you aren't really looking forward to it , those days this simple conversation can be so difficult. Luckily till date i haven't had such a day.
Now take another statement , its great fun to have chicken in front of a non vegetarian who cant have chicken that day . Its just plain mean and i just don't get it. I just don't understand the logic behind it, why would someone drive pleasure out of someone else's discomfort. And theres no real animosity here , no hatred just plain brotherly love.
Right you will come across such people , my initial reaction was to fight back to give snap responses. Simply shoot from the hip as it came. As i said before it consumed me and brought out the worst in me. The end result would usually be an argument. Then i realised that in reality there was no real intent behind his comments, its just that he'd lived in such circumstances, or rather moulded himself in such a way that this was now the way he was. I really cant improve on him , i cant change him no matter how much i push for it. I have dealt with people like this before , iv found it the most difficult to work with them, they are just black holes for energy and intent , but none the less they can be worked. But that's not my point. Basically what im trying to get at is that no matter what happens once you realise that being negative is a part of someones nature and that the contempt / gumption trap is not really intentional , then its easier to just radiate energy, enthusiasm and intent and usually it does rub off even though it might be for a limited period of time. Its like charging someones battery for a period yes i might not like doing it but that then im doing it for a very selfish reason. So i talk big, not react now and life's better . Another strategy that i have found quite useful is clearly pointing out negativity / gumption traps, though id use this selectively. But the most important technique is to not take it seriously and specially not to carry it with you, and that my friend is the lesson i have learnt over this weekend. It works now , im not critical i have accepted facts for what they are thats what makes me what i am. Clearly its not entirely out of my system if im blogging about it, but believe you me it does help me function better.
Right so lets just get a piece of how i go about blogging currently. Every morning when i get up i generally think about what im going to write about, actually a mini Aha moment occurs while i experience something or while im thinking about something, but yes a basic tiny two liner is drafted in my head every morning. Now whether i get the time to write this idea down , is another thing. So many thoughts have risen and died within a span of a day. At times when i do sit down to write it just doesn't work, i mean either the ideas weak , or boring or just to random for completion ,and then it stays as a draft very rarely completed. And those might be the days that die without a word out.
So what was bothering me this morning you might ask, and i shall lay the thought before you for for consumption. I woke up and all i could think about was negativity. Have you ever come across people, who just are unpleasant , you meet them once and thats just about it , you feel depressed and angry, and then you meet them again and you are certain its not worth another meeting.
I have very recently come across one such man ,and sadly enough its a flatmate. The nature of the man is such that if you were to give him food even though hed been hungry for decade, im certain he would find a way to criticise your cooking, either the salt would be too much for his palate, or he'd complain that the food wasn't hot enough. But thats just not it if it was just a an overcritical man it would be fine, but whats really loathsome is that such a man hides it all behind a highly inflated sense of morality and ooh the manipulation. I think that's getting a bit too personal now. But somehow even the notion of such a man just brings about the worst in me forget about the actual being. Everything is not good enough, if you suggest a restaurant, and the service is slow he would blame you for it not directly but He'd comment in such ways and associate the restaurant with you that you feel responsible for his misadventure.
But that's not it either everything seems so vile for example this daily conversation that we have which I think is basically a gumption trap set for me every morning. The conversation flows like this and this usually happens as im dressing up, or having breakfast before leaving for office
Me: Hello Good Morning (im a good morning person strange enough)
He: hi so are you going to office today
Me: (no im getting dressed for your dads wedding) Haan saab(sir) I have office today
He: saab(sir) aaj holiday nahin hai
Me: nahin saab are you off
He: No but app chutti lele (take a leave today) how much you will work ,every day, they make you work so hard. (delivered in a sarcastic tone)
I personally felt that this morning ritual is specifically put in place to just get me started on the wrong foot. I mean imagine a day you are not really in the mood for work, you know you have an hours commute ahead of you and you aren't really looking forward to it , those days this simple conversation can be so difficult. Luckily till date i haven't had such a day.
Now take another statement , its great fun to have chicken in front of a non vegetarian who cant have chicken that day . Its just plain mean and i just don't get it. I just don't understand the logic behind it, why would someone drive pleasure out of someone else's discomfort. And theres no real animosity here , no hatred just plain brotherly love.
Right you will come across such people , my initial reaction was to fight back to give snap responses. Simply shoot from the hip as it came. As i said before it consumed me and brought out the worst in me. The end result would usually be an argument. Then i realised that in reality there was no real intent behind his comments, its just that he'd lived in such circumstances, or rather moulded himself in such a way that this was now the way he was. I really cant improve on him , i cant change him no matter how much i push for it. I have dealt with people like this before , iv found it the most difficult to work with them, they are just black holes for energy and intent , but none the less they can be worked. But that's not my point. Basically what im trying to get at is that no matter what happens once you realise that being negative is a part of someones nature and that the contempt / gumption trap is not really intentional , then its easier to just radiate energy, enthusiasm and intent and usually it does rub off even though it might be for a limited period of time. Its like charging someones battery for a period yes i might not like doing it but that then im doing it for a very selfish reason. So i talk big, not react now and life's better . Another strategy that i have found quite useful is clearly pointing out negativity / gumption traps, though id use this selectively. But the most important technique is to not take it seriously and specially not to carry it with you, and that my friend is the lesson i have learnt over this weekend. It works now , im not critical i have accepted facts for what they are thats what makes me what i am. Clearly its not entirely out of my system if im blogging about it, but believe you me it does help me function better.
1 comment:
Nicely written and described :) could feel connected :)
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